The bit that you skip #102: Broken Social Scene – Almost Crimes

Picture this. It’s a saturday in 2008. You’re unemployed but have some money from odd jobs. You managed to score a ticket for one of the hottest gigs in town. You have no idea of 5 out of the 6 bands that night, and you go with a couple of friends you will no longer be friends with in less than four years.

Hey man, I just wanted to see The National live. I was obsessed with Boxer and had to see them live. Sod the other bands, I want to lose myself to Squalor Victoria and Fake Empire. And I did lose myself, and although I was planning for an early night, my friend Yartzi (name has been changed) convinced me to stick around for Broken Social Scene. I’ve heard of them, but never listened to them.

Look, you gotta admit that sometimes there’s too much music on your plate and I’m terrible at faking it. Yartzi said we could go for burgers afterwards (which meant he was going to go silly on weed while I ate my burger and get a contact high). Besides, I had to pick my parents from the airport at 8 AM and I needed to be somewhat ok by then.

So, I decided to stick around. Spin me around on a piñata as you blast Feist’s 1234, Broken Social Scene are phenomenal. You betcha I bought You Forgot as soon as I got paid. Barely managed to pick my parents though the next day. Between the contact high and the late end to the night, I was dead tired as I arrived to the airport.

Broken Social Scene are that band that a certain type of music aficionados like. This is not a diss, as I like them too, but you can tell who is a fan by the way they socialise (terribly) and how much they open up once they warm up to you (plenty).

I wouldn’t see them live for a long time. And I do mean a long time. Just like Heaven 2024, to be exact. I had just arrived to Pasadena and was ready to pass out from the heat. It took ages to get in and I couldn’t wait to buy an overpriced beer (27 bucks PLUS TIP!!!) These two dudes in front of me were loud and funny, and the line was slow as fuck. I was antsy because I Broken Social Scene were next on stage and I had already missed Warpaint. After the two dudes got their beers, I walked up, asked for a beer, took a sip and my card was declined. Social anxiety going through the roof, my heart ready to skip town. “You gotta be fuckin’ kiddin’ me” I said as a reflex, looking for another card while the salesperson was getting increasingly angry at me, and very justified for it. Then I hear a loud “BEEP”. One of the two guys in front of me had just passed his card and then looked me “catch us on this stage in five minutes”.

“Was he…?” a woman behind me said, while grabbing my shoulder. “Nah, they get free beer on their riders!” said the other woman with her as I moved along and made my way to the stage. I didn’t recognise them with the hats and sunglasses, but I’m 80% sure it was Kevin Drew and Brendan Canning. Or maybe roadies? Would I get my throat punched if I asked about Steal my sunshine? Still, I can half-honest (nah) say Broken Social Scene saved me from heatstroke by buying me a beer at Just like heaven 2024.

And fuck Banamex, by the way. International card my fucking flat ass!

-Sam J. Valdés López

Leave a comment