Do not adjust your opinion

Bass is underrated

Singles reviewed : What the Blood Revealed, Adi Carter, Heroes of the Mexican Independence Movement, Johan Reinhold, Floating Death Picnic, The Bedford Incident, Black Market Serotonin, Nowhere Again, Ninetails, The Hudares

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Greetings, readers bought all seven copies of my self-help guide, Getting back at the rustler that stole your red oxen (vol .2 Electric Boogaloo)! Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles are double-double, so watch out for that trans fat in our delicious cuts of smoked shoegazing bacon. Mind the indie dance chicken. And for Krist Novoselic‘s sake, don’t throw your bass in the air, you might end up writing political science for the rest of your life while you wallow in self-pity on that day you said no to a high paying job packing foodstuffs in orange bags at Sainsbury’s.

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Field Music, Alvin Purple, Master and the Mule, Cut yourself in half, Holy State, Baddies, Blacklisters

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Greetings, readers bought Orestes P. Coltrane’s guide to stalking your kindergarten teacher (vol. 1 Jello o’death!! Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of Mexico‘s own Safari Tacos. Great food, so-so service, great memories. Go for a Quesafari al Pastor, which basically is a big arse quesadilla with pastor meat (the non-unionised Mexican equivalent of kebab meat). It fucking rules and best of all: it has a lot of piña (that’s pineapple in Spanish).

Ah, singles, right:

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Single Reviews : Two Skies, Sickboy, Greymouth, Revival Hymns, Antlered Man, Finn Bonel

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Greetings, readers bought all five copies of my self-help guide, Growing your own fairtrade kebab bonsai (vol .1 Ikkebana for the Soul)! Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of Top Gear‘s delicious chili con carne. Now, if I could be any of them, I would be James May. He’s the intelligent one of the bunch. Although, how intelligent can he be while still tolerating Clarkson? The mind boggles. As much as Basil Brush‘s brush. That is not a double-entendre.

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles – Niña, obLONG, Captives on the Carousel, Model Village, The Wooden Birds

Greetings, readers who bought all 2 copies of my self-help guide, Surviving Christmas Break Ups with Turkey marinated in Rum! Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of Robert Patrick, the Terminator and Agent Doggett. His brother is in a fucking awesome band called Filter and he dropped by in a concert to shout and headbang. AWESOME.

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Singles – Gregory and the Hawk, Wot Gorilla?, VSP, Austin TV, Castrovalva

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Greetings, people who still think Freddie Hubbard is a legend (he is). Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column.  Yes, the second one of this week. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of Billy Joel‘s fantastic music and the realisation that him and Michael Keaton look quite similar, especially in the 80s.  I’m supercereal, you guys. With bananas, skimmed milk and maraschino cherries.

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Forest Fire, Jay Leighton, Blacklisters, Tomorrow we sail

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Greetings, readers bought all three copies of my self-help guide, Stalking Chris Martin for the Common Cow. Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of Jarvis Cocker‘s beard and his recent disappearance into the great Gillette in the sky. Now, if he could only sing ‘Like a friend’ whenever I go to the shower, life would be grand. Although ‘Mile end’ would be more fitting

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Fresh Snow, Tomorrow We Sail, Ali Koehler, Cave Birds, Late Night Fiction, Rarechild, Azitiz

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Greetings, readers getting banned from a certain Sheffield dive bar after calling the owner a “bellend” (he/she deserved it, though, I REGRET NOTHING). Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human slaves review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of Venom and Carnage, those two idiot symbiotes from Spiderman,  and their recent foray into Benetton ads. What’s the deal with ‘em, yo?

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles : The Savage Nomads, King porter stomp, Birdeatsbaby, Mazzy Star

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Greetings, readers drinking Rice Juice (fairtrade, natch!) and biting on that Slutty Rutty Butty you blagged from the Rutland Arms while the boss tries his Billy Bellend Tour 2012 t-shirt.

Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of B.S Johnson’s books and the letter Ch. Because when I was a kid, the nuns said it was a letter. So it is.

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Dennis Hopper Choppers, Psychic Twin, Silicon Ballet, Stalagmites, Wet Nuns

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Greetings, readers drinking Abuelita chocolate (not Fairtrade) while reading Doctor Who and the Cybermen while the boss is buying a helicopter. Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy both of Adi Carter‘s mad remix skills and Rutland Arms, easily the best pub in Sheffield. Yup. Deal with it. And no, they didn’t pay us. Yet. Skint mofos…

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Pistola Kicks, LickSpittle, The Lucid Dream, Ethan Ash, The Narrows, Stalking Horse

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Greetings, readers drinking decaffeinated fair trade perry (wah wah remix) and nibbling spoons while the boss is singing the latest Coldplay dirge. Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Problem?

This week’s singles come courtesy of Electro and his goofball villain persona. Not the gritty Electro that appeared on the Sin-Eater arc of Spidey. That depressed me when I was a kid.

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Hiatus & Shura, Hollows, Buffalo Bones, Master and the Mule, Ellen and the Escapades, Future Shape of Sound

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Greetings, readers drinking HP Sauce (locally sourced and with adduct amines) and nicking egg noodles from Lukin’s while the boss is sniffing acetonitrile (which is better than a mojito – fact). Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human writers review ‘em. Mahalo. 

“Who are these bands?” You might ask from your all-knowing chair (ergonomic-ah from ikea). Well, the names are attached. Give them a try. You might actually like them instead of buying another edition of Arcade Fire‘s The Suburbs (the Where’s Wally Edition).

This week’s singles come courtesy of Jimmy Saville and his gold chains. Man can do no wrong in my book. At least he ain’t Roman “Detritus” Polanski. Fuck that asshole.

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Miniature Dinosaur, Deerhoof (w/Jeff Tweedy), Twilight Sad, The Miserable Rich, Esben & the Witch

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Greetings, readers drinking styling moose earwax (decaffeinated, natch!) and nicking ginger cookies biscuits from the recently divorced red-haired bird at the office (buy her a pint) while the boss is buying the 600 quid remaster of Achtung Baby (aka the second best U2 album, after Zooropa. Deal with it). Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column. Granted, some of them aren’t singles, but I liked them and made my stupid human collaborators review ‘em. Mahalo. 

This week’s singles come courtesy of Galactus and his recent addiction to vanilla Twinkies. Now, if he could only drop the planet kebab, we would all be happier and safer (but not fitter).

Ah, singles, right:

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Singles: Gaoler’s Daughter, Afghan Raiders, Pisco Sour Hour, Matt Kim Andrew WK Soulja Boy, The Payroll Union

Greetings, readers drinking discount Kombucha mushroom tea (SUGAR!) and sneaking a looksie at Nardwuar (he rules) while the boss is listening to Adele (aka the music equivalent of Bridget Jones). Welcome to another edition of our “off again, off again, hey it’s on again!” single reviews column.

This week’s singles come courtesy of KISS getting snubbed from the final line-up for the Michael Jackson tribute. Now, that’s weird. It’s already a cash grab, why snub the masters of the sell-out?

Ah, singles, right:

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Three shades of noise

The Loud – Harris Shutter

Stream – ‘Avida Dollars’

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Flying crane (from the hood)

The Legend of the 7 Black Tentacles – Let’s begin now



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Synth is Golden

Review: Pulseprogramming –Charade is Gold

Chicago’s Pulseprogramming, the brainchild of vocalist/producer Marc Hellner, are a multimedia studio-based collective that have been releasing material for over a decade. New album ‘Charade is Gold’ is a beautiful slice of subtle synth-pop which delicately mixes dreamy shoegaze with analogue loops, undulating bass, deep monotone male vocals and uplifting, airy female vocals. (more…)


Sheffield and California, sitting under a tree

Mazes Spectrals and Best Coast @ Queens Social Club, Sheffield

It was a very sunny Thursday, a strange occurrence in Sheffield’s “blink and you miss” spring, one that has felt more like a bad mood swing.

So, in order to cure those weather-got-me-down-blues, what best than 3 very uplifting bands to rock out in that place where time stopped, Queens Social Club?

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Go ahead, you can laugh all you want…

Gig Review: Ben Folds @ o2 Academy 26.02.11

Ok so, I know it’s almost a month after the fact (blame my dissertation for this) but I just wanted to do a little ditty about the Ben Folds gig I went to last month.

My whole family loves Mr Folds, so my ‘little’ brother and I decided to fork out the hefty £25 for a ticket to see the fella live in Sheffield. Seeing as we’d both seen him a coupla times before, we knew it would be worth it in the end…
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Deep and Dense

Album Review: Firesuite – You’re an Ocean Deep, My Brother

The first time I listened to Sheffield-based band Firesuite’s new album, ‘You’re An Ocean Deep, My Brother’ I almost had a cortical aneurism and it took me a full four weeks to pluck up the courage to listen to it again.

Let me explain…this record is so big, so epic and dense that I really think it is going to be of massive importance to this band’s career. When I heard it I went, “Oh my god…” and I couldn’t really take in the sheer heroic scale of thing. All I could think was, “How the hell am I going to review this?!!!” Well, eventually I managed to think up some strings of word-descriptors to do so; I was planning a piece of expressive contemporary dance but the editors pulled the plug on that at the last minute…so, words it will be.
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Come to my pod

Cats:for:Peru + Zapp Brannigan @ Sheffield Hallam Hubs, Pod A

A gusty Wednesday brought me to the Sheffield Hallam’s Hubs, that strange maze of party rooms, bars and never-ending binges.

Below, people massed to see some football match between squads I have no knowledge of. Music first, sports later.

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Mike Starr (1966 – 2011)

 

Stream – ‘Got me wrong’


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Dance your Indie self away

Starfucker – Reptilians

Streaming – ‘Quality time’

The skinny: Dance with Indie. Or the other way around.

The review proper: The sound of indie bands replacing their xylophones and glockenspiels with midi and keyboards.

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Hope in dissonance

The skinny: Shipping News SMASH!!

The review proper: Louisville’s quartet is angry and will tap your shoulder to let you know this.

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